Anger. Regret. Depression. Drug and alcohol abuse.
Those are only some of the consequential emotions and behaviors listed by men and women who have experienced abortions. Their stories are remarkably similar. They thought abortion was the answer to their problem, a quick fix, an easy way out – only to realize that ending the life of their child gave birth to a new world of pain.
“They told me I would be fine after the abortion, but they lied. I went home and tried to commit suicide,” one woman said.
“It was a defining moment in my life,” a middle-aged man said. “It defined my character. I spent 30 years, or more, just being angry, being resentful.”
Thankfully, this man and woman, and others like them, have found grace, forgiveness, and healing through Care Net’s post-abortion Bible studies. Jill Marquis, the Director of Abortion Recovery and Care for Care Net, has revised both publications in the last two years.
Forgiven And Set Free: A Bible Study for Women Seeking Healing After Abortion, originally written in 1986 by Linda Cochrane, enables readers to bring their emotional scars “out of the dark past and into His holy light where true and lasting healing can take place.”
Reclaiming Fatherhood: A Bible Study for Men Seeking Healing for Abortion, provides a road map to healing for those struggling with the emotional and spiritual fallout of abortion. The study guide, written by the late Guy Condon, a former Care Net present, and David Hazard under the title Fatherhood Aborted, was originally published in 2001.
In a recent social media video for Care Net’s Abortion Recovery Care (ARC) resource website, Marquis noted how confronting the pain of the past is the first step on the road to healing.
“There is a consistent occurrence in both men and women after having chosen abortion,” she said. “The immediate response is relief, ‘We’ve solved the problem.’ But what happens over time is that relief diminishes and regret begins to creep in. And where those two cross, it’s at this point where restoration can begin.”
FORGIVEN AND SET FREE
Over several decades, thousands of women have found restoration, healing, and grace through Forgiven and Set Free. Some recently testified to power of Care Net’s Bible Study in a short video.
“Forgiven and set free changed my life. It was where I learned about God’s forgiveness, and I learned how to forgive,” said one woman.
Another Bible study attendee said, “You now have a group [where] you can share your heart; [this group] will become a sisterhood where you can trust, and share those parts of your lives that you have kept so hidden. In sharing them, you can find the healing you need.”
RECLAIMING FATHERHOOD
In revising Reclaiming Fatherhood, a focus group of men willing to share their abortion stories and journey together to find God’s grace and restoration gave added depth to the re-release.
“The way men and women experience and process abortion is very different,” Marquis said.
One of the major differences apparent in the focus group was the presence of underlying anger.
“What I have heard from each of these gentlemen was a deep sadness. The abortion had stolen their voice, their manhood, their leadership, and their children. Each man said that he didn’t know how deep his wounds were, only that there was something very wrong,” Marquis said.
“I carried this burden much too long,” said one man in a recent video for ARC.
“God is a God of redemption,” said another man. “The truth will set us free and we can walk in the truth and be a blessing to others.”
One Bible study attendee was hopeful that the process would help men reach out to other men and support each other, knowing that “they don’t have to be in their own little silo” dealing with their problems all by themselves.
Ultimately, Care Net is helping both women and men find healing and mercy at the foot of the cross. Their weakness and shame is being made perfect by His strength (2 Cor. 12:9). Darkness is transformed into light.
“Jesus endured incredible physical pain on the cross,” Marquis said. “One of the beautiful things about His forgiveness is that He turns that pain into beauty. He takes those ashes of our lives and turns it into beauty. And when we tell our stories to other people, we get to see Christ in action.”
For more information or to find a healing ministry near you visit abortionhealing.org.